Andy vs. The Hummingbird!!!
Right'o evryone, I'm Kevin Irwin. What we have here is a battle of the
ages! Thanks Irwin, we'll take it from here. To boast our ratings, we've
made this special series for the enjoyment of all viewers--especially kids!
Today's showdown is the elusive Andy vs. the speedy, yet deadly hummingbird.
Now of course the playing field would at least be even and just maybe give
Andy the edge should he have his tennis racket. Andy would be able to swat at
the hummingbird a lot easier. But this is the animal showdown, as it would happen
in nature. So here we go!
Hummingbirds range in size for they are found all throughout North and South America.
The Bee Hummingbird of Cuba is the smallest at 2.2 grams! That's way less than a clothespin!
The largest of hummingbirds is the Giant Hummingbird of South America.
They can grow all the way to about 20 grams. That's almost like 3 clothespins put together.
Now the hummingbird is fast in every way possible. With an average heartbeat at 1260 beats
per minute, this thing is in hyper-gear! Not only that, but at 80 wing-flaps per sec, you
can't even see or hardly imagine how fast that is! This bird would be ducking and weaving
faster than any boxer could ever be. Andy wouldn't have a chance when this bird decided to
go after his face. The bird would poke at his eyes, nose, ears, etc. Andy could try to swat
to his best ability, but sooner or later, his stamina would go down unlike the hummingbird.
Now Andy on the other hand at 4 ft 8 inches tall weighing in at 111 lbs., Andy as a huge
size advantage. He must be thousands of times bigger. This is literally Jack and the Beanstalk
all over again. The only thing is that like the giant, Andy would just be way too slow against
a hummingbird. This battle is just about over. Although this battle might go on for a little bit,
because the hummingbird has no knockout blow, eventually after a few rounds, this showdown would
And the winner is...The Hummingbird!!!
Our producers have just notified us that our records of Andy were
dated 1997. Therefore, we would like to apologize to the hummingbird and
our viewers for a slighted misrepresented Andy. In fact, Andy is not that
small anymore and is much bigger, thus making him slower, hence a faster win
for the hummingbird. Thank you.